Quit pussyfooting about this!
You are a strong woman and you don't need to wring your hands.
What is it about the Catholic wringing of hands? "Oh, I wish I knew what God wanted me to do! Oh, I wish I knew what to do in this situation! Oh, if only I could discern God's will! I won't do anything until then. Doing nothing is always holy, after all, isn't it?" I know, I know, you're not that bad, but this is the tripe that comes out of the mouths of so many Devout Catholics.
And, yes, as you say, the wheat and the tares are mingled together and they will not be separated until the End of Time, and Our Lord will separate and judge them, we won't; our job is to be the wheat, not the tares. But you don't have to judge this man's soul to know that you have to avoid him. "Judge not" means "judge not" the soul or eternal fate of another; it means never despise your neighbor. But it does not mean, "Be a child and don't make any assessments or decisions about people or situations."
When we do just that - when we refuse to admit the truth before our eyes (in this case, the truth that this "problem priest" is indeed a sick and potentially dangerous man) - we build up, not the Body of Christ, but the pit of hell. We assert and confirm a kind of nihilism. We testify, by our actions, that reality ain't really real, that the Unreality that we assert is all that matters. When we fail to call a spade a spade, we affirm implicitly that we cannot even wield the elemental power of a rational creature, which is to see what is and to name it (Adam's job, from the beginning). When we refuse to admit that the sky is blue, we allow people to claim that it's any cloying color they want it to be. When we don't say, "Enough is enough. Things have boundaries and so do I," then we witness, by implication, that life is indeed what the "we create our own meaning crowd" tell us it is - the suffocating bubble of our own imagination.
Be real about reality. This is called Prudence, and it is a virtue.
That man is a sick human being and not a good priest. Avoid him.
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